Marlow Bottom Acoustic Club

We had three people perform original songs this week.

• David F doesn’t sing his own material often enough IMO, so it was great to hear Gone Too Long for Returning again. According to my reckoning it’s only the third time he’d sung it at the club.
• Martin B has aired a few of his own recently – this evening’s as Walk Barefoot in the Sand and was particularly good.
• As usual, Dave H’s songs were self-penned. The Little Sardine is a newish one, and was a big success last time he played it The Dog & Badger and was again this evening. The excellent lyrics are below.

THE LITTLE SARDINE

Protesters with banners they shout and they hail
Save the Panda the Tiger and Orca the Whale
Conservation symbol is only a dream
No-one gives a sod for the little Sardine
Silvery shoals we glint in the sun
In formation we look as though we are one
The net has just snagged and come undone
So swim for the hole and let's have some fun
The skipper is swearing and cursing the boat
The propeller has just wrapped itself round a rope
To finish it nicely would be hope upon hope
That a sardine bone gets stuck in his throat

CHORUS

Our cousins and us we all share the same fate
Anchovy, Pilchard, Sardine and White Bait
Rectangular tin with a best before date
Always the starter, not on the main plate
Tomato juice, olive oil, like Sardines we're packed in
Headless, boneless, without any skin
Final humiliation, you just-cannot win
They solder the key to the lid on the tin

CHORUS

Of all the fish that live in the sea
The salmon is king I think you'll agree
Then someone discovered Omega 3
And that put us right back on the top of the tree
Folk clubs the world over you can say without fail
There'll be a bloody song on hunting the whale
Stormy seas, shipwrecks and fighting the gale
Not one Sardine song will ever prevail

CHORUS

Sardine, Anchovy and Pilchard and that
All wonder what kind of sarcastic pratt
Collectively lumped us all up as a sprat
Something you find in some mangy old cat
So high street supermarket, wherever the place
When a conservation box is rammed in your face
Searching for change, not to look mean
Ask how much of this for the little Sardine.

CHORUS

Other highlights of the evening (in round-the-table order) were:

• the always-good Limehouse Lass from Dick
• Mose Allison’s Everybody’s Crying Mercy from Rosie and me
• Song for Ireland from Debbie
• Tony’s song about God arriving for afternoon tea
• Martin’s version of Drifting Blues
• You Win Again (the Jerry Lee Lewis blues-style song, not the Bee Gees one) from Alison, David & Simon, featuring some guitar wizardry from Mr Fenner, taking advantage of the action on a certain Martin guitar

We’re at The Belle Vue next week. Holidays made the attendance a bit sparse last time there, so let’s make a good effort this time!

We welcomed John the Norfolk Trucker via his for-one-night-only abode - the Handy Cross layby. John had come a few times before but I’d only remembered his visit to The Pegasus. However, within a few words of Bill Caddick’s lovely Dream Factory, both Rosie and I pictured his previous visit to The Old Ship.

It was great to see Dave and Norma again, especially with Norma looking so well, winning the raffle and choosing the wine now that she’s allowed to drink again! Dave now has a Morgan trilogy: Sticks/Swim/Run and played them as a set for us.

I'm sure everyone will agree that the stand-out moment of the evening was the world-premier of Fred’s original song, My Alpaca. The lyrics are below (reproduced with Fred’s permission).

My Alpaca Chorus: My Alpaca, He’s no slacker He chews coca and tobacco He's so truly soft and woolly That it keeps him warm at nights; He’s a cracker, my Alpaca And he’s useful in a fracas And he’s handy in the Andes ‘Cause he’s such a head for heights! I’d much sooner An Alpaca than Vicuna; It would not make me calmer If I were fobbed off with a llama! Chorus I would be a silly billy If I were journeying in Chile Not to make use of such a creature -That’s the lesson I would teach ya! Chorus It's a thing that does console us That we know how to throw a bolas There are no fences now to cramp us As we wander round the pampas Chorus Around the campfire eating nachos And sipping lovely cool gazpachos We hear the stories of the sideshows From the garrulous old gauchos Chorus

Other items of note from the evening were:

• Down the Can – a new original song from Kerraleigh and Martin
• Izzy demonstrating why her name has two z’s in it after she’d played a nice jig in Am
• One Year Later (and one jig faster) from Douggie
• Three bird songs from Stuart and Delia (Blackbird, Crow, Chicken)
• The very short Good King Arthur’s Pudding from Ian
• A couple of Germanic-sounding (at least to me) but English polkas called (I think) Walter Balwer’s 1+2 from Paul
• A solo David F and his version of The Everly Brothers’ Take a Message To Mary
• Rosie and I were there too…

My apologies to the young woman in green who may well have wanted to sing, but left before I managed to ask her to.

We’re at the Dog & Badger next week. I’ll try hard to ensure that everyone who might want to join in gets the chance.

Dick Frost he was there
Singing songs that we all knew
We all sang along

T'was Rosie's birthday
Somehow to our great delight
She won the raffle

Roger had a box
A droning loud noise it made
Alison liked it

Terry joined us too
His head never was bereft
His fingers were lead :)

Debbie Dibley sang
She was given two CDs
We do hope they please

Alan played along
And his wife she sang a song
They were excellent

Alison and Dave
In their usual good form
They sang and they played

Karen was annoyed
Accompanied the shruti
In a key too high

Stuart and Deal-ya (poetic license)
Music stand at the ready
To aid their playing

Concertina Liz
Lovely unknown tune she played
But we know it now

Tony from the north
Carved wood on concertina
He ate, sang and played

Kerraleigh she sang
With Martin and his guitar
And lovely it was

Another Martin
Solo sang and played guitar
Very good it was

Dougie he looked pale
All shook up was he, he said,
For Liz drove too fast

Simon came at last
Better late than not at all
But no middle stool.

As usual, we had an excellent turnout at The Prince Albert. Sadly, the Fenners could not be with us because David has cricked his back. He currently considering buying a new guitar. Simon has suggest that he should consider a Crickenbacker.

We were pleased to welcome Nigel, who’s finding his way back into the folk scene after a spell working too hard! His first number was Joseph Baker. He’d played this at Sidmouth while Pete Coe (who’d written the words) was in the audience. Second time around, he sang his own song Hawthorn, Mistletoe and Ivy. He finished with Blackwaterside which has an interesting recent history, having been recorded by Anne Briggs, Bert Jansch, Sandy Denny and Led Zeppelin. It came closed to being the subject of legal action for breach of copyright. See here for an interesting take on this.

There was a time when it was common for the B side of singles (remember them?) to be instrumental versions of the A side. We had the reverse – Stuart and Delia first played Westering Home as a concertina duet (with Rosie turning snippets of it into a trio by reading the third part over Delia’s shoulder). Later, Delia gave us the vocal version, which Andy had apparently learned at school.

Stuart contributed to a Devon theme, with Smuggler’s Boy that he’d learned from adopted Devonian Jacky Oates and Tavistock Goosey Fair (always a favourite). We also visited Widdecombe Fair courtesy of Simon, who sang Steve Knightley’s haunting song of that name. Martin also sang a Steve Knightley song – The Vale.

We also had a couple of songs from the East of England. Rosie and I had just returned from our annual holiday in Norfolk so it was appropriate for her to regress to her Norfolk accent for the Kipper Family’s All On The Shore (The Body) – AKA Overstand. Ian sang Sidney Carter’s The White Buck of Epping, about the proposed cull of a white deer that might dilute the genetic purity of the herd.

We also heard:

Dick: Let Union Be, Turkish Men of War, Mancurian Border
Ian: Greenland Whale Fishing, Old Maid in a Garrett
Martin: Don’t Fade on Me (Tom Petty), Lucky Man (Dave Francey)
Rosie and me: Am jigs, Ole Devil Called Love, Blame it on the Sun (Stevie Wonder), Silver Spear/Sally Gardens
Steve: Every Now and Then (Garth Brooks), Bless the Broken Road (Marcus Hummon / Nitty Gritty Dirt Band)
Simon: ‘List for a Sailor
Richard and Andy: Arthur McBride, If I Were A Carpenter (Tim Hardin), Singing the Blues, Banks of the Roses, Old Kent Road

We’ll be at the Dog and Badger next week (15th). Hope to see you there.

Dick was in high hopes of occupying the new armchair suite. There was no sign of any of the high heid yins. We delayed and delayed, and even had the barflies asking when we were going to play some music. By this time the darts players had taken possession, so we stayed where we were. There were four of us: Ian, Dick, Terry and me, Fred. The guest ale was Black Cat beer, a "chocolate malt" at 3.4%. Safe to drive home with. Certain individuals were said to be sporting themselves in the crags and eyries of Norfolk. There was a spirited review of Towersey, with reflections on the price of drink there, and rumours of someone getting their mobile-home stuck in a marsh, and animadversions against singer-songwriters. But eventually Dick kicked off with "Bring us a Barrel". Terry was in full folk-critic mode, and reminiscing about his old days of playing blues. He gave us "Mary Love" (The folk-club, lass, won't do for you), accompanying himself on his mandolo. Then I had a crack at "Norwegian Wood" on the willowflute. Dick was nodding his head, so it's recogniseable. Ian sang John Barleycorn, and we raised our voices in chorus aginst the volume of the barside chatter. Dick followed that with "The Innocent Hare", and Terry supplied "The Bold Fisherman". I took out my high D whistle for "The Roaring Barmaid" and "Get up Old Woman and Shake Yourself." At least with a high whistle you have an edge against the background conversations. Ian sang "Ratcliffe", and Dick "Limehouse Reach". John manifested himself and took a stool against the far wall, until he realised there wasn't a crowd, and came and joined us. We weren't falling apart but we weren't far off it. Continuing the naval theme, Terry gave us "Water and Beer", revisiting the biblical legend of Noah. I sang "The Road to Venezuela" (per Stackridge) and we had a rousing chorus. Ian stubbornly insisted on being nautical with "Cruising round Yarmouth". Dick was still smarting under the fine imposed upon him the last time he sang it, but he wanted to get the rest of the bar singing. It was "The Wild Rover". And they all joined in like good 'uns. Dick was grinning evilly by the end of it. Terry shifted the mood with "The Flowers and the Guns", but John shifted it back with "If you had a brain you'd be dangerous". Then I played "Country Roads (take me home)" on the Willowflute. Ian resumed his theme with "On Board a Man O'War, Boys". Dick led us in "The Lusty Smith", going for the rousing chorus. This prompted Terry to sing "Letters to and from a young man". John felt that if Dick could sing "The Wild Rover", then he could sing "Danny Boy". Oh yes. It was all coming out, the folk club dark-side. Chorus? I'll give you chorus! So I led them in "Ilkley Moor bar't'at". They seemed to know that one. Ian sang "The Jolly Tinker" and Dick "Drink Old England Dry". Terry had had enough of original songs by then, and was back in folk-critic mode, so he sang "The Songs they are a Changin'". John released his alter-ego in the song "Big John". We had a bit of trouble with the bass notes. My voice was beginning to go. I resorted to a lyric sheet for "The Big Rock Candy Mountain" expecting Dick would join in, but it was the Woody Guthrie one, not the Burl Ives version he knew. Ian capitulated to the general mood and sang "Old Maid in the Garret". It was getting near chucking out time by then. Dick was looking around for his taxi. But he gave us "The Fatal Glass of Beer". (It wasn't beer, it was bitter shandy! ) Terry couldn't let us go without one last quick one, so he sang "The Good Ship Calabah". So there you are. We wuz the hard core, keeping the legend alive!